Three Quick Updates

Sometimes I’m guilty of writing a post in which the ending is in question and then forgetting to follow-up until someone asks me, “Whatever happened with such and such?”  So, here are three updates on things I haven’t talked about lately.

1.) The mysterious next-door neighbor’s invisible son. Would you believe it has been at least another month since I wrote about this and I still haven’t seen FedEx’s son!!!  But the weird thing is that during the day when he is at work, I have seen lights on in his kitchen.  So, maybe rather than the son being a decomposed mummy, which was my favorite explanation, he was just in a terrible industrial accident in which he was exposed to radiation.  Maybe he has greenish skin that has sort of melted all over his face and body and he glows in the dark!  It could be that this mysterious son only sneaks out of the house in the dead of night, wearing a mask and cape, to search the woods out back for woodchucks, which is the only nourishment he can keep down.  Boy, that would be a relief!  For awhile there, I was afraid something odd was going on.

2.) The quitting smoking. Remember back this summer when I decided to try using electronic cigarettes to see if they could replace regular cigarettes in my life?  Well, I am very proud to report that I haven’t smoked a tobacco cigarette since June 13, 2009!  Now, if you’ll recall, I never felt an urge to stop smoking like a lot of people did.  But, I felt that if the  e-cigs could free me of the tars and carcinogens of smoke, well, that would be great -  IF, and only IF they would fulfill my oral fixation.  And they have!  I can honestly say that since I went with the e-cigs I haven’t had the slightest yearning to smoke a real cigarette.  And I know in my heart that I never will again.  As a matter of fact, since I quit regular cigarettes I’ve developed a superwoman-like sense of smell.  I can be in a store and smell smoke on someone a mile away.  So, do electronic cigarettes work?  They sure have for me.  Praise the Lord!

3.)  Did my lip surgery work? On November 25th I had lip surgery to repair a varicose vein that I’ve had on my bottom lip for years, a result of much intensive dental work.  Well…here is how the lip looked BEFORE

And here is how my lip looks today, or AFTER!Can you say “Hallelujah?!”

Okay, now that you’re all updated and everything, I guess we can all go take a nap.  Sweet dreams!

Till later,

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The Beginning of Something Good?

Let me be clear, I’ve always enjoyed smoking, not because I’m a “slave” to nicotine, but rather because I take pleasure in the “ritual” of lighting up, inhaling, and holding a cigarette.  It calms me, always has.  And yes, I know it’s bad for me, but we each choose our vices.  Some are addicted to drugs.  Some eat themselves to death.  Others become alcoholics.  I do none of those things.  So I’ve always believed, “judge not, that ye be not judged.”  And I’m damned tired of people judging smokers!

But then I read this post on Grandad’s blog, “Head Rambles,” about him trying an electronic pipe and liking it.  I was intrigued.  I began to research “electronic cigarettes,” only to find hundreds of dealers and endless lists of people who had made the transition from tobacco.  An “e-cig” looks, feels and smokes just like a real cigarette only without any of the over 4,000 poisonous substances and harmful chemicals found in real cigarettes, such as tar, carbon monoxide, acetone, sulfuric acid, etc.  It operates on a battery (which looks like the body of the cigarette.)  The tip lights up, but produces no fire.  The “smoke” one inhales and exhales is actually water vapor.  (Ah!  No one whining about second hand smoke!)

After you buy a starter kit with batteries, atomizer, filters and recharger, all that’s left to buy are filter cartridges flavored to your tobacco choice.  Or, you also have the option to buy “blank” filter cartridges and fill them with several drops of “E-liquid.”  These come in a multitude of flavors, from menthol and Marlboro to vanilla, coffee, cherry, clove, chocolate – you name it!

I didn’t want to stop smoking.  BUT, if I could have the experience of smoking without the cancer-causing chemicals, additives and tar of regular cigarettes, didn’t it make sense to at least try it?  I decided it did.  I ended up getting two different types of e-cigs, one that looks like a cigarette and one “pen style” which is black.

When they arrived, the first thing I had to do was charge the batteries eight hours.  Fortunately, they include battery chargers into which you just screw the “cigarette” battery.

As I read the literature that came with the two different sets, I wondered if this would really work for me.  One suggested that you occasionally smoke a real cigarette as you wean yourself away, and promised that, eventually you’d find the real ones tasting more like crap. (That’s exactly what it said!)

So, a couple of days ago, I began my experiment.  My first impression was that the white cigarette felt a lot heavier than the real thing.  Also, I had chosen “light” menthol, not realizing that I would have to draw harder on the e-cig to taste it.  The black e-cig was thinner and longer, and has a mouthpiece which I like.  The first day it was touch-and-go.  I thought, “this isn’t like a real cigarette.” But, the second day I tried dropping several drops of vanilla e-liquid into the filter…and it was a whole different experience! My first thought was “Maybe I CAN get used to this.” It tasted nice.  I was smoking, but there was no real smoke.  I kept tapping the thing over an ashtray before I realized there was no ash because there was no fire.  This was a cigarette that wouldn’t burn away if I went into another room to grab something. When I was doing something else, I could just put it into my pocket.  The “pros” started piling up.

Of course, now the FDA is trying to get them blocked so that they can test the long-term effects, which is ironic since tobacco cigarettes are legal and we know the long term effects of them!  But since when didn’t the government try to get authority over everything?

Anyway, as for me, I’m cautiously optimistic.  I’m finding my need for “real” cigarettes slowly diminishing.  Today I only had three.  This could really be a life-changing decision for me.  Maybe even a life-saving one.  We’ll see.

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